Going Down to Cardiff
by Fem America 13
Summary: The South Park boys are caught in the Rift and go to Cardiff where they meet the Torchwood Three Team. There they will face the Ice Warriors, and have to find a way back home to South Park.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

In the Hub, the headquarters of Torchwood Three located in Cardiff, Wales, the Torchwood team was cooling off from the adventure with John Hurt and Captain Jack coming back after leaving the team for a year, because he saw the Doctor and left with no notice because the TARDIS and the Doctor having been avoiding him because he is a fixed point in time and space, which means that he can never die. The air in the Hub was quiet, but still filled with mistrust and suspicion towards Captain Jack given the circumstances and his mysterious past. Then, suddenly the rift monitor went berserk and Toshiko went over and checked to see where in Cardiff did the Rift acted up.

The Japanese woman called to her fellow teammates, "There was an opening of the Rift in a old warehouse in the North East of the city. It lasted for 5 seconds, but it was pretty powerful." Once the team heard about the possible aliens being out in Cardiff and their immediate thought was that the aliens would not peacefully interact with the human public of Cardiff, like the Cybermen and Daleks in London, which caused Torchwood One to be destroyed. They all piled into the Torchwood van, Captain Jack taking the wheel, Gwen in the passenger seat since she was the leader of the team while Jack was away. The three other teammates were in the back, Ianto was next to the window, while Owen was next to the other window, because those two don't get along well, and Tosh is in the middle between them, using her tech to track the Rift energy. Tosh could aslo, if need to stop her other teammates in the back from fighting.

After a ten-minute drive with crazy driving courtesy of Captain Jack, the team pulled up to the abandoned warehouse where the rift energy was coming from. They got into the positions in case there were attacked by belligerent aliens like they usually were. The team then saw four boys running away from some green-armored aliens from Mars (Ice Warriors). The boys were wearing winter clothes, and their outfits, for each of the boys, was one wear a green hunting cap, a orange coat and green mittens. Another of the boys was wearing a dark blue cap with a red pom pom, a brown coat, and red mittens. The third boy was extremely fat and had a light blue hat with a yellow pom pom, a red coat, and has a pair of yellow mittens. The last boy wore a orange parka that completely covered him and had brown mittens.

The Ice Warriors were shooting at the boys, and because the Torchwood team main objective was to protect the human race and the four boys looked innocent, they fired back at the boys and the Martians, but the boy in the orange parka was shot and killed from the crossfire that took place. The firing from Torchwood stopped because of the death of the boy. The Ice Warriors escaped and ran into the streets.

While that was going on, the boy in the dark blue cap yelped, "Oh my god, they killed Kenny!" The familiar scene was playing out like many a South Park episode, but only one, Owen, of the Torchwood team was suspicious by this scene.

The boy with the green hunting hat passionately replied, "You bastards!" Everyone, besides Owen, on the Torchwood team ran forward to help the boy in the orange parka.

Owen looked at the four boys, and finally figured out what show they were reminding him of. It was an American statirical cartoon known for its vulgarity, which he had seen once in awhile as a teenager.

Owen then blurted out, "Where are you boys from and what's your names?" He was trying to grasp at the hope that the boys were from South Park and the boy in the orange parka was Kenny, which means that he was going to come back to life.

Gwen, mad at Owen for his insensitivity to the recent death of the boy in the orange parka, snapped at him, "Owen, that isn't necessary when their friend is dead!"

Before Owen can respond to Gwen, the fatass said to Owen, "My name is Eric Cartman, and this is the fucking Jew." Cartman was being his usual jerkass self, and that made Kyle mad at Cartman for his anti-Semitic actions.

Kyle interrupted Cartman, "Stop ripping on my religion, fat ass! Any way I'm Kyle Broflovski, my best friend is the dark blue hat who is Stan Marsh. And our friend that is dead is Kenny McCormick."

The medical officer (can't call him the doctor because of the Doctor in Doctor Who and Torchwood) snarks back at the second-in -command of Torchwood Three, "Well, because Kenny is like Jack, so he will come back to life."

Captain Jack faced Owen, and in a sarcastic tone of voice, said, "How do know this? There is only one that is like me in universe." He looked at the medic wondering why he was thinking that the boy would come back to life.

Owen rolled his eyes and then replied to his boss, "Because they're are the main characters from South Park, and Kenny dies every episode, and the next one he is back to life."

Stan then yelled, "How do you guys know where we live?" He didn't realize that their lives were a popular adult cartoon made in the US.

Ianto, with a serious, but a slight confused face, said to Owen, "Well, the boys don't remember that Kenny dies and gets brought back to life." He somewhat remember what some others had told him about the show.

The mechanical genius stated, "But is that show fiction. It's an American adult satirical cartoon known for pushing the limits on censorship. How can it be real?" Even though she knows that aliens exist, she was still wary about cartoons and fiction coming to life.

Cartman, sick of waiting around and not caring that his "friend" Kenny died, said, "Well, screw you guys, I'm going home." Captain Jack, deciding that even if they weren't from South Park, they needed to take the boys to the Hub, and he tased them because it was the easiest way to get them all back to the Hub.

Author's Note

Thanks for reading this story, and if you liked or have something that you think that needs improvement, please leave a review. And if you want more of the story, please favorite and follow the story. And I won't kill Kenny every chapter in this story. And since this story is un-betaed, and if you want to, please let me know if you want to beta it. It would be extremely helpful, because four eyes are better than two.


	2. Chapter 2

Ch. 2

The following morning, in the Hub, were the four boys in bed, tucked in carefully, with them looking peaceful as they were dreaming pleasant as if they were in their own beds. Kenny, on the other hand, look like he was sleeping at a great sleepover with his friends. Kenny appeared in his bed at the stroke of the midnight of the new day. They slept peacefully, until the alarm clock rang at 8 am, since the Torchwood 3 team wanted to make sure they had a good night's sleep.

Kyle, after hearing the alarm and seeing that it was way past the time that he had to get up for school, mentally went back to his home, yelped, "Shit, I'm late for school. My mom is going to kill me." He then looked around, and wondered where he was and why his friends, and Cartman, were here. He woke up the other boys, and the first one to respond was Cartman.

The fatass testily replied, "Why is the Jew here? We weren't having a sleepover?" The mentioned boy, after hearing Cartman use one of the most common insults to him, got red in the face and was about to yell at the other boy, but was quiet for a second too long to get his knee jerk comeback at Cartman.

Stan, after taking a breath and remembering what happened last night with Torchwood, stated, "We aren't in South Park anymore. Some weirdos shot us and brought us in here." The Cartman and Kyle finally remember, as Kenny already knew what happened to the other boys since he died and wasn't drugged by the alien hunters.

Kenny mumbled, "Why in the fuck would they do that for?" He then remembered about how he was killed by the Ice Warriors, so he thought they maybe alien hunters who shot first and asked questions later.

Cartman, being inconsiderate as ever, rounded on the boy wearing his iconic orange-parka, saying "You just ran away." That comment got the fatass a dark look from Kenny, and the thoughts that the boy that dies and comes back to life were around the lines of I didn't run away, I was killed by the Ice Warriors, which by the way, fucking hurts, fatass. After a few seconds, they heard a soft four taps on the door and it creaked open.

Ianto, like a mouse, entered the room the room carrying breakfast and some of his famous coffee. He started to talk, " Here is some breakfast for you guys..." but he slowly realized that there was a fourth boy that was there. The Torchwood team only put three boys to bed, in the bed. With Kenny's body, the Torchwood Team put him in the autopsy room, on the cold, metal table so that Owen could analyze what had to him.

Kyle, looking at Ianto, expression dropped after he saw the quick change in his expression. Concerned about his friend, Kenny, Kyle questioned Ianto, "Why are you looking at Kenny like that?" with an armor-piercing glare. Ianto was thinking, but didn't say in case he was going mad, but the Ice Warriors shot him and Kenny's alive.

Creeping behind Ianto, Owen smirked at Ianto, in a I told you so look. Ianto then shot Owen a look that said not right now. Kenny looked at the adult's reactions to see them, and he tried and correctly put together what caused their reactions, and he said, "You remembered that I died?" in complete shock.

Stan, hearing what Kenny said, but couldn't imagine that Kenny actually died, blurted out, "But, Kenny is still alive, and anyway he is just a kid."

Owen, with the same self-satisfied smirk on his face, stated "You said the second part when Kenny got muscle atrophy." That remark got Owen another look from Ianto, which said why are you trying to get them upset, and they're only kids after all.

Kenny blinked in surprise and then his eyes narrowed at Owen's comment, given that it looks like he knew what happened in their life, just like if they were a tv show. This knowledge made Kenny suspicious and wary of Owen.

Cartman, blurting out what came to his mind, and not caring about how Kenny or his other friends, replied, "No, Kenny was away at the hospital for a long time, he didn't die." The other boys, besides for the person who actually knew what happened and was stuck it in Cartman, were shocked in the lack of respect that Cartman was giving to something that really hurt the class and they weren't exactly over.

On the other hand, Kenny blew up over Cartman's and Owen's lack concern on that death. He turned to Cartman and fiercely mumbles, "Cartman, stop acting like this isn't a big deal. You told me we were best friends when I was dying there. But you were just acting, given how you treat what happen with an unemotional air and you used the fact that I was dying to sell and use aborted fetuses. And to make another restaurant!"

Captain Jack Harkness overheard the conversion and was walking up to the room where the boys spent the night at Torchwood 3. He then politely inquired, "Kenny, what are your experiences with death?"

The boy who dies a lot gave a knee-jerk reaction, ""I keep on dying and it fucking hurts."

Captain Jack took a little breath to prepare himself for this, and responded, "I know how you feel."

Kenny mummered back, "How in the fuck do you know about that! You don't die all the time!" The dark hair man looked like he was shot by Kenny's accusation.

Captain Jack defended his comment by these word, "I do actually. It was all because of my friend, Rose Tyler. She brought me back to life after the Daleks shot me, when she was the Bad Wolf. Since she made me a fixed point in space and time, I can't die."

Kenny came back with a snappy remark, "And do people remember that you have just died?"

"They do remember, but I have dealt with this a long time. Many of my friends and loved ones have died, while I have stayed the same age. You need to find something to help you get through the day, so you should try to something useful with your life." said Jack. Kenny's eyes widen at the thought of this. Jack thought for a while, grabbing small ideas to help Kenny out. A light bulb went off in Jack's head, and he spit out, "Maybe you can be a superhero. And your persona's name can be Mysterion."

Author's Note:

After a long hiatus, I have finally got to finish this chapter. I'm thinking of having this story be three or four chapters long, but if people have suggestions or ideas to make it longer please tell me. I'm also looking to see if anyone wants to beta this work, since I'm doing this mostly by myself and it would be lovely to have a second pair of eyes to look over my stories. Anyway, thanks for reading and extra thanks if you rate and review.


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